Dear Ashfire,
I'm starting out with an apology. See, I don't think you know this, but you're the main character of the novel I'm trying to write. I wrote the first draft way back in November - remember that? In the last half I was churning out 2,000+ words a day and having the time of my life. I finished your novel; really, truly finished it; wrote an epilogue and everything; the plot was a line, a squiggly dotted line, but still a line.
And then December rolled around, and I looked back at what I had written, and I couldn't bear to see your (imaginary yet still horrifically intimidating) face.
I started to rewrite your story in mid-December. The setting alone was worked and reworked and reworked again until it was finally starting to resemble a fantastical world, and your dear companion and possible love interest had an entirely different personality. Finally, I felt ready to bring it all to life again.
By Christmas I tore up those plans all over again.
See, this is what writing my first ever novel is like. There's the exciting birth of the idea, the rapid flow of words, the splattering of black and white paint all over the digital landscape. And then there's the realization that I'm, how shall I put it, a sucky and just plain boring author whose work doesn't make any sense. And there's the struggle. And the headaches. And the strangling your critical artist friend when she notices a flaw and you don't want to admit she's right.
And the rewriting.
It always comes back to that, the rewriting, the editing and polishing and frowning, the starting from scratch. I have no idea how many revisions it'll take before I'm happy with your book. I have no idea how many more it'll take before a publisher would even look at it. But it'll be okay, because I still love you, and I still want to tell your story.
Now I've written the prologue and finally settled with a Chapter 1 that I kind of sort of like. It took almost a month. I might have to change everything all over again later. But I know that I'm making progress, and I'm enjoying it - and that's all that matters.
So, my dear Ashfire, get back to work being an anti-hero. I've got you covered.
-------------------------read the novel here: Sun Road------------------------------
The process of writing sounds very much like that of an experimental scientist working on his/her dream project: brain-storming, study design, set up the experiments, testing, re-testing, again and again until you get the result.
ReplyDeleteIt is true that you have to enjoy it and that is what matters.